Sunday, January 2, 2011

Happy New NASCAR Year

I hope all of you had a good Christmas.  I'm not wishing you happy holidays, because it was Christmas, darn it. 

Here's to a good 2011 season, and hoping that your favorite driver, no matter how lame he is, wins.  I hope we make a few new year resolutions soon, and my resolution list says:

1. I resolve to write more often.

2. I resolve to write even oftener.

Does this make sense?  I will do my best. The 2011 season is just around the corner, and I'm guessing it's going to be great.  During my time off, I've written some great stuff, and I hope to put some of it on here soon. 

Take Care!

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Sorry For Not Posting More

My mother just passed away after a long and difficult illness, and that's the main reason I haven't been around for a while.  I hope to be back soon, and in fine form.

I've got quite a bit of analysis about the NASCAR season that I'll get to later.

I hope each and every one of you who reads this will check back in with me later, probably after Homestead.

Thank you,

Jimmy C

Monday, October 11, 2010

Things That Make Me Say 'Huh."

There is a show called LA Ink on the TLC channel, which I’ve had the chance to see on and off over the last couple of years.  It’s about a lady named Cat, who does tattoos professionally.  I didn’t know this, but apparently, the latest thing is to get a tattoo on your throat, at least in LA.  Letting someone stick a needle in your throat, marring your skin for life, is apparently the ‘in’ thing now.  At least in LA.

Now, I suppose I’m pretty backward.  I don’t even suppose that anymore, I know it.  It’s not just because I live in SC, which, in this case, doesn’t stand for ‘Southern California,’ but because in my case it means ‘South Carolina.’

I’m not much embarrassed about it.  Even here, in the belt buckle of Baptism, people get tattoos.   I don’t really mind.  I think that most of the people that do get tattoos are idiots, and will one day be sorry they got them, but I don’t mind.

Back when I was young enough to be impressionable enough to even think about getting a tattoo, the only people I ever saw with them were old Navy veterans who had basically an ink spot on their forearm or shoulder, and by the time I saw them, it was pretty hard to figure out exactly what they were.  It wasn’t until lately that I really associated tattoos with what they now are:  A part of youth culture.

Unfortunately, I see more and more people my age or older getting tattoos now, and to me, that’s more than a little sad.

Clint Bowyer got penalized 150 points by NASCAR for basically having the back of his car jacked up by a track wrecker when he ran out of gas and was being pushed into victory lane.  That kind of stuff makes me scratch my head.

Dale Earnhardt Jr. seems to be stuck in some time-space continuum, from which he cannot escape, running almost as badly as the guys with no real sponsors.  Heck, sometimes he even runs worse than some of them.  That makes me wonder.

I know that Bobby Labonte will be released from his present position, which means running laps and finishing 37th or so every week, and will be running in the 47 car next year.  That seems like a decent step up for the 2000 champion, but I’m wondering how Marcos Ambrose will fare at Richard Petty Motorsports next year.  Hmmmm.

Kasey Kahne will be driving a Toyota next year, I suppose, for Red Bull.  Kasey might be setting a record for the most brands driven in the shortest amount of time by a Cup driver.  Kasey Kahne started out in a Dodge, is now driving a Ford, and supposedly will be driving a Chevrolet in 2012, after driving a Toyota in 2011.  That dude gets around, that’s for sure, and it’s really no fault of his own.  Technically, he’ll only be quitting one job and taking another, but things in NASCAR are strange sometimes.

Martin Truex Jr. left the #1 Chevy at Earnhardt-Ganassi last year, and so far has no wins in his new ride in the #56 Toyota with Michael Waltrip Racing.  Jamie McMurray, who replaced Martin in the #1, has won the Daytona 500 and the Brickyard 400 at Indianapolis this year.  I like Martin Truex a lot, but wonder how he’s feeling about that deal right now.

Do woodchucks really chuck wood, as depicted on the Geico commercials?  Hmmm.  I don’t think we have any woodchucks here in SC, which, of course, stands for South Carolina, not Southern California Tattoo Country.  Since that is the case, I think I will wait until some furry varmint chucks wood at me before I chuck it back at him.

Does this Chase for the Cup seem more interesting than usual?  Like, uh, let’s say, maybe it’s because a guy named Johnson hasn’t come along to dominate all of a sudden?  I don’t dislike Jimmie Johnson by any means, but four in a row is becoming kind of boring.  Let’s see someone new win it for the first time and be genuinely excited about it for a change.

Is it normal for a cat to like hot dog wieners?  I have a cat who loves them.  He’s even stolen one from me when I wasn’t looking.  He likes steak too, which was not such a surprise to me.  I know he doesn’t need to eat like this all the time, but I figure a treat once in a while is OK.    Does that make me a terrible person?

Does anyone think that Rachael Ray is overextending herself?  She’s seems a little scatterbrained on 30 Minute Meals lately.  She also seems to be losing her voice at times.  I like her a lot, but wonder if becoming the next Oprah isn’t taking it’s toll on her.

I’ve got too much time on my hands, I think.  How about you?

Monday, September 20, 2010

Things I've Noticed

I’ve been around for a while  There’s actually quite a few things I’ve noticed.  Bear with me here, please.

I’ve noticed that old men who do play by play for college football are sometimes bleeding idiots.  Not specifically, but generally.  But that’s just me.

I’ve noticed that NASCAR seems to have bent over backward to allow dirty play back into the mix as far as winning championships go.  I Also just noticed that my chances of getting hired by NASCAR are about zero.

I’ve noticed that Dale Earnhardt Jr. fans are not respected very much.  I think that’s a shame.  I’m a Dale Jr. fan, but I’m also a Smoke fan and a Happy fan.  I assume that I’m still disrespected, but I’ve only got one thing to say to you haters.  Hammer You.   Thank you.  I feel much better now.

I notice that most people in the reporting business don’t take NASCAR very seriously.  But, seriously, how can one run at 200 MPH and throw the races, like most of the geniuses seem to think they do.  Does NASCAR have a master OFF switch that just cuts off a car that’s getting too competitive?  Strangely enough, some people will believe that.  Maybe I have some ocean front property in Oklahoma to sell them too.  Call me.  We’ll do lunch and talk about it.  Just imagine it.  You could be the first on the beach in Elk City.  Wouldn’t that be a kick!

Is it possible for people from certain parts of the North East to pronounce the letter “H?”  There’s a very good guy on the radio down here who pronounces words such as “Huge” as “Uge.”  I know it’s a regional thing, but it still bothers me.  God put 26 letters in the alphabet, so let’s use them, please!  I don’t want Sesame Street to be telling me that “H” is feeling left out.  That would probably make me cry.  You don’t want to see me cry.  It would be ugly and humiliating.  Or maybe, Umilitating. 

Is it possible for a guy named Brent, who’s been on ESPN for way too long, to quit calling the color guy “Herbie?”  Even I, sitting here at home feel embarrassed for this guy.  If you listen to ESPN or even other guys on the radio or TV, you’ve probably heard of him.

I notice that “Herbie’s voice gets shrill when he’s passionate about something.  Like when Auburn makes a mistake.  As I write this, I’m watching Auburn play Clemson.  So far, the score is 17-3, in favor of the Clemson Tigers.  So far, some Tigers are more equal to others.

I’ve noticed that most of the Kyle Busch Fans hate Dale Earnhardt Jr..  Huh.  I’m a genius, aren’t I?  Probably the reverse is true as well, but I’ve not met many true Kyle Busch fans.  I’m not saying that there aren’t any, I just haven’t met many.

On that note, I’ve also noticed that lately, the media types have been referring to Kyle Busch as the bad boy of NASCAR, but it seems to me that Carl Edwards has been involved in far more incidents lately.  Mostly with Brad Keselowski, which are the most popular incidents, but also with Denny  Hamlin as well, which happened most recently in Sunday’s New Hampshire race.  Speaking of New Hampshire, I can remember lying on the couch with my soon to be step daughter, who was about five years old at the time, watching a New Hampshire race.  She kept saying “New Hamster“,  I thought it was pretty cute, so I didn’t correct her.  Later, I found out that she had been quizzed at school, writing the names of the states down in their proper places.  I saw the big red X beside the word scrawled just above Massachusetts.  It said “New Hamster.”  Had I not had so much confidence in myself, I might have felt a little embarrassed.  I thought it was actually pretty funny, until I made the mistake of relating the story of  “New Hamster” to her mother, who was by then my wife.  For some reason, she didn’t think that was so funny.  I was then properly embarrassed.  Actually, it would be pretty cool to have a state named for some little furry animal, I think.  Maybe “New Poodle?” 

I’ve noticed that Dale Earnhardt Jr. had a fourth place finish in Sunday’s New Hamster, I mean Hampshire race.  I hope he can keep up that kind of performance for the next nine races.  It’s way better than 30 something, 3 or 5 laps down.  I’ve got some more things to say about Dale Earnhardt Jr., but I’ll wait until a future column to say them.

I’ve noticed that the South Carolina Highway Patrol has some officers assigned to this general area who seem to have way too much time on their hands.  I was recently in a convenience store on state Highway 81, which is a fairly major road leading from Anderson, South Carolina, to Greenville, South Carolina.  I was working on a computer problem for the owners of the store, and when I walked in at 10:00 AM, there was a trooper sitting at one of the tables eating donuts and drinking coffee while he read the newspaper.  I left the store at 1:30, and the trooper hadn’t moved, except to buy more donuts and coffee.  I work for myself, but even by my standards, that was a long coffee break, or lunch break or whatever it was.  I’ve also noticed that there are often as many as four or even five State Troopers on a certain stretch of Highway 81, often all within a 5 mile stretch.  I know, because I’ve asked, that there are no such things such as ticket quotas for these officers, but I was once told there are such things as “performance standards.”  Why one certain stretch of a state highway holds so much interest for these officers is rather mystifying to me, except for the fact that the speed limit changes quite a bit over this particular part of the highway.  I suppose it’s better to catch mom and pop in the family Buick doing 7 mph over the speed limit, than to catch possible drug smugglers out on Interstate 85, which is very nearby, and possibly take a bullet in the chest or head.  I’m not brave enough to do what they do, so I suppose catching speeders on Highway 81 makes sense when you think about it that way.   Whatever it is, it’s our tax dollars at work.  If you think I live in Hazard County, from the old Dukes Of Hazard show, you’d be just about right, I suppose.


I notice that even though it’s more than half way through September, it’s still hot here in the South.  I’ve lived here for 47 years, so you would assume that I’m used to it.  I don’t think I am.  Right now, I’d rather be in Minnesota, preferably in the northern part, on a lake, fishing for northern, or muskies or something.  It would probably be cool during the day, and pretty darned cold at night.  I would consider that good weather to sleep in.  Eventually, we’ll have our winter here even in the South, and we’ll probably have our ice storms, and occasional snow storms even.  Then I’ll be complaining about the cold.  I’ve noticed that I’ve done that before.

I’ll probably do it again too.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

A Few New Pet Peeves

I know, I should shut up about this, but I just can’t.  This is my site, so I guess I can get away with it this time.

What is it about people, of all ages, apparently, with the tattoo thing?  When I was a kid, the only people I ever saw with tattoos were old Navy veterans, and they had something on their arms that might have been a portrait of their mom, or maybe a portrait of Waylon Jennings when he was smoking a lot of dope.  We couldn’t really tell, to tell you the truth.

Now, it seems like everyone under the age of 35 has got to have a tat of some kind or other, and a lot of people my age, or even older have jumped onto this bandwagon.  I guess I’m just a little bit too old school for this entire deal.  I wouldn’t get a tattoo, any more than I’d get my ear pierced.  I’m watching a show on TV about tattoos.  Most of the people here are getting them to show friendship for their friends.  What ever happened to just being friendly to your friends?  Bake them a cake, or some brownies.  Watch their pets, collect their newspapers and mail when they go on vacation.  I’ve had a lot of friends in my life, but I never had the desire to have their names permanently attached to my epidermis.  I guess I just don’t get it.  Call me an old whatever, but I really don’t get that.  Had I gotten my wife’s name tattooed to my butt back in ‘94, I’d really feel like an idiot now.  There is a song that Duane Allman did back in the late 1960’s, and the first words of the song are “I ain’t seen my wife for two or three years, I’m a happily married man.”  In my case, try for 5 or 10 years.  I’m very happy I haven’t seen her during that time.  I hope I never see her again, to be honest about it.

I’m guessing that the tattoo removal business must be just about as lucrative as the tattoo installing business.  How many guys have had a few too many and had the name of some girl tattooed on their arm, chest, or whatever?  How many girls  have probably done the same thing?  6 months later, the Yellow Pages are out, and tattoo removal is probably the topic.  Like I said, I’m old, apparently, at 47.  I just don’t get the tattoo thing at all.

Another thing that irritates me is sports media, in general.  Yesterday, the entire world, it would seem, waited breathlessly while Brett Favre walked up to the podium, and said yes, indeed, he would play for the Minnesota Vikings in 2010.  Duh.  I knew he would.  So did the rest of the world.  Big deal.  Great for the Vikes, bad news for the Packers, probably.  Whatever.

Tiger Woods has been a major irritant to me this year as well.  Not so much that Tiger cheated on his wife, etc.  That’s his business.  I’m not in a position to judge him.  I do get irritated by the fact that most people who are supposedly in the know are writing off Tiger as a future winner in the PGA or any other golfing event, ever.  Tiger is the best golf player I’ve ever watched, except maybe for Jack Nicholas, but Tiger has had a pretty rough year.  I think he’ll be back, but I don’t see why there has to be 24 hour a day coverage on how bad Tiger’s season has sucked this year.  Tiger knows he sucked this year.  Anyone who watches golf knows that.  I don’t watch all the events, but even I know that.  I think Tiger will be back though.

I also get irritated by all the know it alls that have deemed Dale Earnhardt Jr.’s career as being “done, like a Christmas turkey.”  I actually heard that on the radio today.  I suppose it’s a tribute to Dale Jr.’s fame that the only thing that the usual stick and ball sports guy can say about stock car racing is that Dale Jr.’s done.  Dale Jr. isn’t even very close to being in the Chase right now.  Nobody on any of the radio stations I’ve listened to have talked about Kasey Kahne’s move, or Mark Martin’s dilemma, or the fact that Kevin Harvick has been the leader in the points race just about all season.  The only thing that the stick and ball guys can talk about is how Dale Jr. sucks.  It makes me want to ask myself why A-Rod didn’t suck when it took him about a month to hit his 600th home run.   What’s the matter, A-Rod?  Need a shot of steroids?

Speaking of Kevin Harvick, he’s one of the major unsung heroes of NASCAR this season.  Quietly, he’s been building up a substantial lead in the Cup series by scoring a lot of top 5’s and top 10’s.  That’s how it’s done.  A couple of wins doesn’t hurt either.

Dale Earnhardt Jr. has won 18 Cup races in his career, and more Nationwide races than that.  Dale Jr., in my humble opinion, doesn’t need to explain a darned thing to anyone.  He’s proven he can do it.  If you know Babe Ruth’s stats, year by year, by heart, but have never been to a NASCAR race, and yet you have a job on TV or radio talking about sports, please, quit talking about NASCAR, when you don’t have a clue about what you’re talking about.  Stick and ball dudes, most of really don’t have a clue:  Shut up.  Live it, learn it, earn it, and love it, and then I’ll listen to your idiocy.

I love NASCAR, and won’t apologize for it.  I had a client a couple of years ago that ridiculed me for being a fan.  She was a fan of Indy League Racing.  Her sport raced “real cars.”  I said “What the heck are you driving home?”  She didn’t answer, after she’d given me a pretty dirty look.

Let’s give NASCAR another chance.  It’s worth it.

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Go to Bristol!

There is a place on the Tennessee - Virginia border that is about the only place in the world where you can see awesome racing while sitting in a football stadium setting.  I’m talking about Bristol Motor Speedway, obviously.  Bristol is absolutely awesome, and for years you couldn’t get a ticket there, because they were all sold out.  Every race, every year.  This year, you could have a chance to go to what I consider one of the greatest tracks on the NASCAR circuit.

If you’ve never been to Bristol, I’d encourage you to go, if there is any way at all you can make it there.  I was lucky enough to get to go to the night race there a couple of years ago, and it was one of the greatest racing experiences I’ve ever had.

The track itself is spectacular.  It’s banking looks very intimidating, and the speeds the cars drive around the track look pretty much impossible.  You quickly understand why the  best drivers in the world race at this track, because very few other folks could last a lap here.

The seating, as I said before, is like a giant football stadium.  With 160,000 seats, it’s simply about the largest sporting event I have ever seen, and if you go, you will probably feel much the same way.  The racing is intense.  There is no drafting at Bristol, such as would happen at Talladega or Daytona.  Bristol is completely at the other end of the spectrum from those storied tracks.  If you watch a Bristol race, you’re watching what I consider to be stock car racing at its best.  These guys will beat and bang all day, rub and bump.  That’s how racing was born, and as far as I’m concerned, that’s how racing is meant to be.  If I could drive my truck around any track that NASCAR races on, Bristol would be my first choice.  I have a feeling that my Toyota Tacoma would probably roll over going through the turns though.

Bristol, at night, is simply spectacular.  If you live within 500, or maybe even 1000 miles, I’d advise you to get your derriere to the track this weekend.  I guarantee you won’t be sorry.

Bristol has been around for a long time.  It’s short track racing at its best.  It probably has been, and always will be, with apologies to Martinsville and Richmond.  The only thing missing for Bristol is the famous hot dogs at Martinsville.  You can buy those, by the way, at least the actual wieners.  Just look at your local grocer and specify pink.  Mention Jesse.  That will do it.

I’ve only been to Bristol once, but as far as I can see, there’s not a bad seat in the house.  That’s pretty impressive, considering that there are 160,000 seats there.  It’s a stadium, and you can see all from anywhere you sit, as far as I’ve been able to tell.

Bristol, Tennessee is almost middle America, but not quite.  Like I said before, it’s on the Tennessee border with Virginia, though it’s not that far from places like Cincinnati, Columbus, Atlanta, Charlotte, even Washington, DC.  You can easily get there in less than a day from all those places.

Bristol is worth every penny, as far as I’m concerned.  If you have to opportunity, get to it.  Do it.  You really won’t be sorry.